Heyy!!!

Long time, no blog.

Don’t know if anyone saw my edit on the UPDATE post, but we’ve had to abandon the themed posts. I did write a full blog about work before realising not only does it give too much away about who I am, but also too much sensitive information about my workplace and I can’t be fired from being a churro chic.

The themed posts include all that other information that was supposed to help explain my behaviour lately but I realised I can just briefly recap that in this post.

INSTEAD I will be doing what this blog was intended for- weekly (ish) updates just about my life as a gap year girl.

So this week has been really long. My parents and youngest brother Connor went back up to Geraldton last week for a funeral, and the car overheated while they were up there meaning they’ve been stranded in Gero (lol rip), and I’ve been left at home with Luke all week. I thought this would be alright, considering Luke is leaving for the navy soon we could spend some time together in his last two weeks. (Yes, Luke is only 17. No he has not completed school. Yes he has been enlisted to do a trade in the ADF)

However, Monday night we both had work so it was already a bit tense with no one else home. I started at 5 and Luke started work at 5:15 so the plan was he’d drop me off and then go to work; luckily he has his license or I would be spending way too much money on uber.

We get in the car 4:50pm ready to go…. and the car won’t start. The battery has died.

Booked an uber for us both and thank goodnesss we both made it in time for work. Monday night I was on with Ruby and Mai and thats chill, except because school holidays have just started it was so freaking busy! I ended up staying until close, like 90 minutes overtime, which wasn’t really a problem but I just didn’t expect to be working so late that night.

Luke and I both got a lift home anyway and dad got RAC to come over the next day to replace the battery. Phew.

And thennn Luke got struck with influenza A so he’s been like dying in bed most of the week. Again, not really a problem but still a bit exhausting. I was responsible for making sure he didn’t have a fever for over 24 hours so I was up at night checking his forehead the first night.

Yeah this week has mostly been okay, technically. I just feel so drained from everything going on lately. I essentially only have the dog to talk to right now, with mum being in geraldton, Ruby on a family holiday, Luke in his room most the time, and no other friends in Bunbury. The dog is driving me crazy; he doesn’t reply when I talk to him and wants to sleep on my pillows at night.

I’ve been getting really close to Lizzie at work, she’s a couple years older than me but she’s really cool which is good. Don’t know if its weird to ask to hang out outside of work though or not.

Furthermore, I feel as though I’ve been pushed to the background by my parents? Not that I need all their attention, or even want it, but seems like everything is about my brothers recently. I don’t know, maybe this is super selfish.

Just, Connor hasn’t been doing so well mentally lately, and it was one of his closest friends’ funerals he’s just been to which was and still is so devastating for him. But I’ve been there in that bad mental space, and I can help him, I know it, if he just talked to me about it. I mean, we’ve always had a different connection because of our ASD, as in he used to talk to me all the time about things going on in his head. Maybe as he’s ‘matured’ he’s trying to distance himself from the diagnosis. Not sure. But I really want to help and no one’s letting me.

And then Luke, with getting his license and now his enlistment being so close, my parents have been on his back about everything. Packing, all his documents, everything in between. Honestly, if they don’t think he can get prepared for it by himself, I don’t know why they think its a good idea for him.

Fuck I don’t know. Just been feeling weird about everything recently. I really need to find a therapist to talk to, because I know I can’t dump everything on my friends, or even my parents.

Oh! On a completely different note, I’ve joined a pole dancing class!!

At the very beginning of my life in Bunbury, I went to a speed-friending (like speed-dating) event about books at the public library. Met some cool people even though I was the youngest there. One of the girl I met and later got the instagram of, Missy, is an instructor at a dance studio in town, including for pole classes. This term she’s instructing a beginner class and I sort of went, you know what, hell yeah!

Hear me out: I am not doing it for sexy/monetary reasons (however at least I know how to in a worst-case scenario if I completely flop at uni). Its really good for core strength, ya girl wants abs; improves confidence, and I can meet more people/make more friends. Its a win win win situation.

So I start pole dancing in two weeks and I’m obviously nervous but also super excited because it is way out of my comfort zone.

I’ve been working most the week anyway, and due to school holidays it is SO much busier than usual. I kind of like the rushes though; at least I’m staying busy instead of just standing around, and once we get a rush you just pick a station and stick with it. Like if you’re making churros during the rush then churros are your job specifically. Same with coffees, and cold drinks. Then we also usually have someone at the till, running orders and cleaning/clearing tables as well.

Like I said, I deleted the post about work but blogging weekly this way should give most of my dutiful readers insight into my job in hospitality anyway.

Its Sunday night, I worked 4 hours and then was asked to stay later, because of a rush. Went to the gym after work and now I’m home by myself yet again with just the doggo for company.

I’m going to publish this blog and then binge watch Criminal Minds for the n^th time.

Goodnight everyone!